Slammin’ Tim Tams While Stargazing at Mount John

A large part of my reason for living and traveling is the search for the next Peak Travel Experience (PTE). Its not enough to be in Peru visiting ancient Inca ruins. You need to be in a hut huddled around a caldron of steaming yellow-green liquid with a circle of the natives drinking chicha. Or in Greece on top of Acrocorinth at the site of the temple of Aphrodite pledging  your love. These experiences are few and far between, and are to be cherished.
I had another PTE this weekend.
Fayne’s niece Laura Fayne Hedden graced us by being our first visitor in NZ, on the eve her 21st birthday yet. (We insist on referring to her by her first two names, probably much to her irritation, because she is the only person named after either of us.)

She has been studying in Perth, Australia, has finished her studies, and came to see us before returning to Albany, New York. Luckily, I have a three-day weekend due to The Queen’s Birthday Holiday June 7. Funny thing, its not the Queen’s birthday (that is in April), and it is not celebrated this date elsewhere. Anyway, we are taking the opportunity to take a wide swing through the Southern Alps of NZ.
First stop was Lake Tekapo, where we had visited two weeks ago. In the interim it has been snowing and the mountains are beautifully frosted.It was ice-cold, crystal-clear, moonless, and a perfect night for stargazing. The observatory on nearby Mt. John is run by the Canterbury University astronomy department and they sponsor nocturnal  excursions to observe the heavens. They are knowledgeable and enthusiastic and were perfect guides for gazing at the Southern sky. With little light pollution, “billions and billions” of stars are visable, the Milky Way is rich and creamy, and I finally understand the Southern Cross. We got to use the one meter lens telescope for a stunning view of Saturn and its rings. Then we went into the glass-roofed café for hot cocoa. This is where the Tim Tam slam comes in. Let me explain.
When you are in the shadow of the old British Empire, there are certain common things you find, whether you are in Gibraltar, the Falkland Islands, or New Zealand. They like their tea time, meat pies, and biscuits (cookies to you and me). One such treat are Tim Tams, two chocolate malt cookies around a chocolate honeycomb-like matrix in the middle covered in chocolate. We had discovered them, and they were good. But Laura introduced us to an enhanced way to enjoy them she had learned in Perth, referred to as slamming. The technique involves biting off opposite ends and sucking a hot beverage of choice (coffee, tea, or cocoa) through the said biscuit.

This results in a transmografication, with liquidification of the center, saturation of the cookies and melting of the chocolate coating. You then inhale it before it disintegrates. I imagine it is much like converting cocaine to crack; the power of the experience increases exponentially. It is sublime. There we were, under a brilliant ceiling of stars, hot cocoa, and an instant chocolate volcano in our mouths. Truly, a Peak Tourist Experience.
(I recommending The Slam to everyone. It is described in Wikipedia, as well as information for trying to obtain Arnott’s Tim Tams in the USA.)
Saturday we headed to Queenstown (appropriate for the Queen’s Birthday), New Zealand’s #1 tourist destination. Along the way we stopped for coffee and All Day Breakfast (which I now thinks means a breakfast to last you all day, not breakfast served all day) in Tarras and learned the tale of Shrek, “NZ’s most famous hermit outlaw Merino sheep“.

It seems he had evaded the herders and shearers for six years, and when  finally corralled then sheared became a world-famous in New Zealand celebrity. We met his owner’s daughter (his cousin?) who tried to convince us he was living in quiet confined senescence nearby at a very advanced age of 16. I have my doubts.

Next was a stop in Cromwell, an 1860’s gold rush-era town (yes, there was a gold rush here too) which was relocated in 1992 when the Clyde dam flooded the old site. It is quite charming, and there is a great photo-op in front of the giant fruit salad.
Then on to Queenstown, an extensive resort area with a compact, very lively center nestled on the edge of a gorgeous alpine like. A gondola lifts you  2500 feet above the town for panoramic views.

Ski season opened here today, and it is also the center of all kinds of  outdoor adventures. It is the home of commercial bungy jumping and jet boating, with lots of sky-diving, paragliding, kayaking, rafting, and other adrenaline-stimulating activities.